Hey Everyone!

So its been about a year since i have last posted. The this is i got a little burnt out and discouraged because no one ever read my posts. but im back, with a new fire. So for those of you who did read my posts thank you very much. I apologize for not writing for a while. But you will be hearing from me a lot more. In the past year God has changed me and moved me in ways i never thought possible. I mean i am due to get married in February! WOOOOOOOOOO! haha.

But the main focus of what i will be writing about is Jesus and how we need to live for him. often times we learn and listen, and most of the time we remember. But its time we stop riding the couch and do something. One thing that has hit me lately is the fact that we as christians are the church. not some fancy super sweet building. As disciples of christ we need to live with passion. A passion that will allow us to take the streets by storm and save the lost.

Decisions.

It is amaizing just how fast your life can change. Most of us grow know and having a stable life. I know that i lived in the same appartment for about thirteen years. All my firends that i have i have grown up with and known for a long time. But now that i am deppent on myself it is way different.

I thank god for puting the people that he has put in mylife. I i am still growing up and learning. and it always seems like there is always someone to help me out and tell me how to do things. But i do know that i have to grow up and take care of my self and figure out life on my own. God wants me to be dependent on him alone. Its not easy but i know that i have to do it. I thank god That he put Joey and Gary in mylife. Joey has tought me a lot in the past couple months. He has pretty much decipled me. If he didnt help me the way he has i wouldnt be whre i am right now. I thank jesus for that everyday. I really dont think Joey knows how much he has helped. But someday he will find out.

And gary is my best friend i can always count on him. lately he has been going through a rough time and he hasnt been the same. but i pray for him every day. He lost his mom not to long ago and he hasnt been the same. And it kills me cus i cant help him. I pray that he comes back to church and that god will pour his grace upon his life. I pray that god wraps him in his arms. I miss the old gary that loved to have fun and always wanted to hang out. But now he has cought up in some things that he shouldnt be in and he is just not in a good place. so just pray for him.

I am just thankfull that god is in mylife. i need him everyday no matter what. I am learning that when i dont go to him that my life gets complicated. And when i do what i want without praying or getting confermation that it never workd the way i wanted it. So for those of you who are lost and Weary, dont give up and dont think that no one cares. God cares and it kills him on the inside when you dont give your life to him. he is the answer to our problems.

keeping my eyes on jesus.

Wow its really hard to keep my life focused for god when all this crazy stuff happens. My whole life i have relied on myself and those around me. I guess you could say mostly those around me. but as i get older i am figuring out that i cant do that anymore. I am almost nineteen and i am figuring out that life is not always the way i hoped or dreamed that it would be. Sometimes that is a good thing and sometimes that is a bad thing. Ha, right now i feel like its a bad thing.

I remember my whole life, especially when i was in high school that i always wanted to grow up and be on my own. I thought that it would be the best thing in the world. Don’t get me wrong it is awesome. But like i said life never goes the way you plan it and it never stops. I have had a lot of fun these past couple of months and i have grown up and learned a lot. I have learned that if your life, to a certain extent, is only what you make it.

As i learn more about god, the more i learn that he can help. but i still cant manage to completely give all my problems to him. Now don’t get me wrong. I am not one of those people who says there a christian and never does anything to show it. And i do know that it takes more than going to church and doing good deeds. I think that is what makes it so hard.

have you ever felt that feeling like when you are drowning and you cant seem to calm yourself that you can swim to the surface, that every second you take flailing around is energy lost that you could have spent solving the problem, and then when you do calm down the light that you were trying so hard to get seems to be so dim that you cant find it. that is pretty much how i feel. i feel like no matter how hard i try i cant find the light.

What to do?

Well now that i am an adult i can make my own decisions. The thing is that not all decisions are made easy. I am glad that i know god and that i pray to him. right now i have some tuff decisions to make and i dont know what to do or how to make them. But i do know that god is good all the time and that if i just give him glory and pray that god will show me a way.

i have been praying about the military and if it is something that i should do. I have always wanted to become a marine. I talked to the recruiter and i really want to do it. But at the same time i cant make up my mind to do it or not. I know that as a christian that it going to be hard to keep strong and not sin. I think that is the biggest reason why i dont wnat to join is because i am affraid of losing my faith. So if you ar in the marines or were in the marines your advice would grately appriciated.

Interesting.

The other day when i was driving with a friend, i had an interesting thought. Has it ever occurred  to that no matter what life keeps moving on whether you want it to or not. for instance i have a hard struggle staying in the church. When i am there i start to become best friends with everyone and start to get more involved and then all the sudden i drop out. But because i drop out doesn’t mean that every one at church stops serving Jesus. I would always wonder how people would become so close to god. It would almost seem strange that the next time i would come to the church and see someone that i new, and they were an even stronger christian than the last time that i saw them.

That’s when it hit me no matter what life will go on wheather you want it to or not. just because you dont try to live the life that you have been given doesn’t mean that others wont. It kind of made sence to me even more when me and Joey, my roomate, were driving. We both come from similar background so we both have similar struggles as christians. This isnt really a struggle but we both see the same problems in out life. Before we were born again and we were still sinners we used to party and get drunk and do the do. Now that we are saved and we dont do that we have seperated ourselves from our old friends. The thing is that they still try and get a hold of us and try to get us out to partys and all that.

It struck when i thought this. that even though i am serving the lord and trying ot live my lif for christ they are still doing the same old thing. Nothing has changed since high school and now. they just live life and dont care what will happen to them. And i thought to my self, if i never found god i would be doing the same thing. I would be out partying and doing nothing with my life. The only thing that really tares me up is that they are all still good friends and they all hang out and i am not there like i used to be. Sometimes i see pictures and i sit there and i can where i would be in that picture if i was there or i hear a story and i think to my self i know exactly where they are and what i would have done if i was there.

So i have come to a point in my life wher i cant change what happens or stop life because i can handle my emtions about everything. The only thing that i can do is keep my eyes on the cross and keep my life on the straight and narow. I have to realize that what god has for me is more important then what this world has to offer no matter how much it hurts.

Spoken!

Well last Friday was awesome. Spoken came to our church along with the red airplanes, one minute halo and Ilia was supposed to have come but they had some transmission problems.  I have to say When i heard the name red airplanes i was thinking that this band has to be WAC. I thought that this band was going to be that good. Well let me tell you this is one of the best bands that i have ever heard. This is only the second concert that i have ever been to in my life and it was awesome. I was quite surprised of the age differnce in the group of people that came to watch the concert. There were kids and adults that decided to come and watch. Of coure Anthony the one that put the venue on had to start a mosh pit. Spoken by far is probably one of my favorite bands out there. These guys just know how to rock like no ones business. So needless to say if you are a christian or a non christian and are looking to rock out, you should definatialy go wathc these guys.

So god has Grace.

I have moved out with two of my friends and it is great. I was very nervous about it that i didnt know what to do with myself. Well i got my license the other day and i am very happy about that because i need to be able to drive so that i can get to work. Well the morning that i took the test i prayed and asked god to just let me be good enough to pass, well he let me be more then good enough to pass, and the cool thing was is i got to talk about jesus to my driving insructor. I was even brave enough to ask her to come to my church. Now driving is great and everything but when you move out you have to pay rent. Well God has blessed me with a job. Now it doesnt pay a lot of money but it does pay decent. And i had to pray forever about that so that i new that i would have money to pay rent and other bills. And my roomates were even cool enough to let me pay less then them.

The point that i am trying to make is, if you just serve god and dont go against his word, he will give you everything that you need. now yes i do need to get my own car. But god will let me get one when i am in the point and time of my life to afford one. God wont give you more than you can handle. So for those of you who are stuggling and dont know what to do. Just give your life to god and do what his word says and he will reward you.

Romans!

I just finished Romans today and i am very glad that i did. I have had a lot of questions and thing that i was confused about and Romans was the book that answered most of them. So if you are struggling with your faith or you have a lot people that ask you about what you can and cant do or what you are doing as a christian i would that you should read Romans.”Romans 1:17″  says that ” for the gospel a righteousness from god is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: (the righteous will live by faith). So as i have been told a thousand times if you want to know right from wrong or you want to know what Jesus wants you to do, stay in your word. Reading your word and Praying are the biggest thing that you can do.  “For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities-his eternal power and divine nature-have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse(Romans 1:20). This means that no one can ever say that they couldn’t know what God wants. It is clear, all we need to do is stay in our word. But it is also our job to Evangelize to people. As Christians we must reach those who don’t know god.  It is our job to take the word and save the lost souls.

So life is going well.

for a while i was not able to find a job and i was trying to move out. which as you know is not the best thing to do. Well i finaly found a job. I will be working at target. Its kind of funny how god puts thing into your life. When i was talking to my friends about moving in with them they said that that would be ok. The only catch was that i needed a job which is perfectly fine. I couldnt find a job for the life of me for aobut two months.  Just recently i hav found a job, and my friends found a two bedroom  a while back so they went ahead and got it. i think that god did that on purpose so that i coul learn a lesson. if they would have got a three bedroom and i would have moved in with them and then not been able to afford it then they would have been stuck with it. But now that they have a two bedroom then it is not that big of a deal. This is my first time on my own so i have to learn how to do it before i can really have all that i want.

It is funny how god will give you things the more you give him things. its just like lifting waits. you will only get the results for the amount of time that you put in. the more time that i put into serving god the more he will let me handle. God has become i very big part of mylife and advise everyone to get to know god before it is to late. Just  a word of advice, if someone in your life is trying to get you into church or they are just always talking to you about god and how you should serve him. dont get mad, the reason that the person in your life is trying to get you to come to church or whatever is because they love you and they want to share to you something that can change your life for the better.

Back to school.

I just want to say good luck to those that are going back to school. I will keep you guys in my prayers. i just want to say that for thos of you who are going back to school, you are going to be tempted by a lot of things. you seniors are going to be tempted by a lot. people call this your last year to have fun. but just remember that god is number one. dont let the experiences that you had with god this summer go to wast. if a guy or girl asks you out, ask them out to church and if they say no then you shouldnt date them. i want to say to those that are going to the school dances especialy prom to be very careful. prom is one of the deadliest nights in hihg school. and to you girls you will be put under a lot of preasure by men to do things that you shouldnt. stay strong and i pray before you go. just stand up for god dont be embaressed.